i feel like a fool, and i'm lagging by one week, if it was in the past, i would have posted out how i felt-yes, all of it. even those hurtful and angry thoughts, but not now. ohman, i feel pathetic. but i guess there isnt a need to(post them out/feel pathetic), and i shall leave all those thoughts right where they are, and people who know them, i'm pretty sure they wont spill it out, thats the word, trust. you've to be pretty sure that theres always a reason behind everything, its not just a series of moodswings or pms, theres a fucking goddamn reason.always. i wonder why you cant even be bothered to ask me, in person when you make those effort discussing with you-know-who(s). isnt it better if you hear things out from the first person point of view? and whats this call? trying to care for your friend, urm its more of the backstabbing i suppose, no? i may seems contented, cause those laughs maybe just empty, very very empty. i prefer care over laughter, friends over people-you-hang-out-with. it just dont make sense when the friendship is so "perfect" without any problems or quarrels, cause those are part and parcel of the growing process right? ohwell, you should know how i'm when people start to judge but now i cant help it, now i just dont know how to define friendship anymore. OH YEAH HAHA, swanser i agree that you're pretty cruel to type out that message into my phone! but thanks for making me realise i shouldnt care for people who dont care whether i'm hurt anot! oh yes, i didnt realise, then. but please do not change my note thing! those are coolzzz stuffs which are profound lo~
well, lifes actually pretty coolzz cause i'm trying my best to accept the fact that my hair sucks after especially,on monday when well, everywhere i go theres people who will go "omg you cut your hair, again!*gasp*" its okay, i'll forgive you guys cause it'll grow, and it've to grow before i go crazy over these stupid maddd stuffs! okay i know it sucks dont remind me anymore! and i'll just stay away from people whom i do not wish to see! as in see my hair, for the time being lol. hmm, oh yeah i just sat on my spects ystd! which means.. i'll get to change my spects no matter what! i swear i didnt do it on purpose! ha, now i feel like fainting whenever i stand up and walk around with the spects, REALLY! woo yay yay but i wont be so stupid to wear spects to school, like some dumbass whom i can still laugh at 24/7 whenever i think of how she look on that monday which i spent my recess and lunch LMAO-ing at~ oh did i mention eoy is nearing and spa is like just tml(i know its like a week away but thats to create the dramatic effect LOL) shit and i seriously thought those tested during mye isnt coming out for eoy again, until recently, damn.
i'm strong on the surface, not all the way though.
